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Brussels to ban sex toys?

BRUSSELS killjoys are plotting to take the buzz out of the bedroom - by banning sex toys.
EU bores plan to outlaw vibrators like the Rampant Rabbit that has put satisfied smiles on the faces of millions of women.
Green Euro-MPs want to ban the use of PVC in electrical goods for environmental reasons.
The move is aimed at old-fashioned mobile phones and dishwashers. But it would also mean a massive Rabbit cull.
The European Parliament’s Environmental Committee is looking to put PVC on a list of materials that are not allowed to be used in electic goods.
They say it is environmentally unfriendly and particularly harmful when it ends up in landfill sites.
The British Plastics Foundation has warned such a move would cost the industry almost £1 billion.
Manufacturers are scrambling to replace PVC with paraffin and polyethylene in computers, TVs, video cameras and memory sticks.
But it would spell the end of PVC vibrators like some of the Rampant Rabbit range made famous by Sex and the City.
Official documents from the European Parliament admit there are problems with finding alternative materials for some products.
An impact assessment report states: “Some of these alternative materials proved unsuitable because of certain properties such as lacking flexibility or bad odour.”
A European Parliament spokesman said the move was aimed at white goods. But he admitted it would hit sex toys too.
“In theory sex toys would be included,” he said.
“Electrical goods end up in landfill sites often in developing countries and that is a problem.”
News of the World sex columnist Tracey Cox said a ban would be a disaster.
She said: “There are going to be a lot of very disappointed women out there.
“PVC vibrators are often the best because they hold the strongest vibrations.
“Most women get their orgasms from their vibrators, not from their men.
“The original wand vibrators that gave so many women their first orgasms are PVC.
“They might want to be environmentally-friendly and get rid of them. But what would women do? They would certainly eat a lot more Belgian chocolates.”
UKIP chairman Paul Nuttall fumed: “Heavy-handed Brussels is trying to take the slap and tickle out of life. Taking PVC out of electrical goods would cost the industry nearly £1 billion and cost the bedrooms of Britain a lot of fun.”

 

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